Back to Exponent Menu Printer Friendly Page   LOCAL FEATURES Friday, November 08, 2002 Priests must ask one another the tough questions, speaker says By Lou Jacquet HURON, Ohio — If there were any priests present for the recent diocesan Priests Convocation here who did not understand the gravity of the situation the Catholic Church in the United States is currently facing, Franciscan Father Canice Connors bluntly put it into perspective for them. “If you don’t think this is a time of crisis, you are really in denial,” the psychologist, educator and author told his audience. He described the clergy sexual abuse scandals as “the worst thing to happen to the Church since Martin Luther nailed those 95 theses to the door.” The current crisis has left priests in a bad light because of their celibacy, he said, which is both unfortunate and unfair. “Today it is really unfortunate that we allow this one-sided presentation of priesthood to be almost so overpowering that we manifest even in our language and our face to the world that we believe it is the truth. It is not the truth, and all of us know it. There is not one person in this room whose life has not been touched by some celibate who really made a difference.” Father Connors said he was abused by an employer, “but the man who made a difference in my soul was a diocesan priest. That story doesn’t get told.” To back out of areas such as youth ministry “is to concede ground which is never to be conceded,” he said. “Celibacy is something to do with helping young people navigate the story of love, and if you don’t have [that ministry] available, we are abandoning one of the places where Jesus said, ‘let them come unto me.’” Noting that 67 percent of sexual abuse happens within families, Father Connors said it takes prophetic spirituality “to allow God to work God’s work within us if we are in the desert.” The solutions will not come to today’s priests on “some parachuted little piece of parchment” but in such assemblies as the convocation, where “we learn to speak to one another about [our] experience of God as lover at this moment of dislocation,” he said. An aging priesthood has the wisdom to share that story and pass it on, he said. Wisdom literature is the place to go in such a time “when one wants to increase one’s sense of tranquility that does not come from denial, but comes from enlightenment,” he said. Wisdom literature helps priests and indeed all Christians to reflect on how God works in and through human experience, he told those present. Sharing the commonality that “God is at work in our lives” prevents celibates from a “sterile bitterness” as they constantly reflect on how God’s love and trustworthiness has been active in their lives. Father Connors said one trait of a healthy spirituality that many priests are reluctant to acknowledge is anger. Anger can manifest something about God’s presence and frequently does so in Scripture, he suggested. “Most of us who deal with clergy find that, of all the human emotions, clergy have the most trouble with anger. We really just don’t do a good job of recognizing it and using it as part of our prayer life.” Pointing out that 37 of the 150 psalms deal with anger, Father Connors showed how prayer begins with anger about the way things are – and what is not going right for God’s people – before moving into praise at the realization that “yes, You are in fact a saving God.” “There is a prophetic energy in anger,” he said. “We are supposed to be engaged and speak of the frustration our people know today. The saddest commentary I hear as I move around [the country] is, ‘Why isn’t Father addressing the crisis?’ ‘Why don’t I hear the voice of my pastor?’” Catholics need to hear that it is OK to bring their feelings about the clergy sex abuse crisis to church, he said. “Anger has a place. Christianity is not all ‘alleluia.’ Occasionally, it is ‘what’s wrong here? Let’s speak to it.’” Fear is an equally strong human emotion (Mentioned 371 times in the New Testament) that priests need to address, Father Connors said. “Yet I have been to a lot of priests’ convocations in which the last thing people mention is what they are afraid of. We have fears, and in aging they become very real.” The greatest male fear is not of dying but of dying alone, he added. “We have real fears that need language because only when we speak our fears does God enter that experience and move the fear to confidence.” Even Christ expressed his fear at Gethsemani, Father Connors recalled. The priesthood crisis in the present moment notwithstanding, “everything will turn out all right because of what we believe about God as lover, about God as one who incorporates and is not the God of Death,” he said. Nonetheless, because of the severity of the moment, it is important not to seek overly simplistic solutions, Father Connors told the priests. So who can today’s priests look to for guidance and inspiration in the current crisis? The saints, he suggested. “Was there ever a time before in the Church when priesthood went through such an experience? Yes. This isn’t the first trip, not by a long shot. And who were the ones who went through it? The saints. That’s why their lives are so important. What’s our comrade relationship with them? They are not patrons. They are elegant icons of what it means to live in trust.” The theology of patronage about saints adopted by many Catholics is overly simplistic, he said. Approaching the saints “as if we have a good friend in heaven” misses the point, the priest explained. “The Communion of Saints has to do with two things: the continuity of human community and an incredible belief that those lives are worth mining, worth imitating.” A discourse with the saints, he said, helps us understand how they survived tough times, often at the hands of their own religious superiors. “Intercessory prayer [to the saints] gives a sense of being in comradeship,” Father Connors said. “That’s what it is all about. Here is a comrade who has gone through the same experience…that we have access to. It is not a life thrown away. It is not a memory reduced to the dust-and-ash heap. It is a vivid story. We all know there are saints who have transversed our life. I still talk with them because they touched me. I’ll always have them, because there is a sense of belonging that helps the spirituality of aging.” Priests cannot avoid the real topics, today, he said, despite the temptation to believe that “if we all get before the Blessed Sacrament more frequently…things will all work out.” Being in front of the Blessed Sacrament is an important place to be,” he acknowledged, “if in fact [being there] is an occasion to reflect on God’s goodness, and to bring that reflection into discourse. But in and of itself, no human action is salvific.” Priests need to be sure that such actions do not deter them from addressing the real issues of the day that must be spoken about, he said. Concluding with thoughts on psychological issues about aging, the speaker noted that priests struggle with the idea of turning to other priests for comradeship and community. Even in the face of the priesthood crisis, he argued, some priests still may say “I can do this alone” and “I don’t need you” to their brother priests. “Do we in fact continue to come to clergy gatherings and sit in sullen silence, so that people see us physically but don’t experience us in any way personally? For many priests he has met, he said, it is easier to reject the caring of others beforehand rather than trust that one’s deepest thoughts and fears, once expressed, will be accepted by their fellow priests. “Fraternity is a question of relationships which demand mutuality and equality,” he stressed, sharing stories of religious priests and brothers of his acquaintance who “carried terrible secrets that stole their lives” rather than share with those they should have trusted the most. The question of self-acceptance priests most need to ask themselves, Father Connors suggested, is “How do I give lots of people permission to love me?” During an afternoon session, Father Connors addressed the crisis again. “The danger today is to move through experience and not deal honestly with what’s piling up in all of us [priests],” he said. “We can’t erase the sexual abuse crisis. How will we keep going? We need each other and we need to do our grief work together. We need to face each other as priests at these gatherings and honestly communicate about where we are in spiritual matters, sharing common ground. The answers are in your midst, not coming from a lawkeeper somewhere outside.” “These gatherings are what we need,” he added. “They are not luxuries. We must ask the Lord to identify what we need.” It is also possible for the Church to make mistakes in the way it grieves its past mistakes, he added. “That we are not lamenting the number of suicides among Catholic priests amazes me,” he told the priests. He also challenged the priests present to ask themselves, “how do we get through this crisis [as a Church] without selling our souls?”   Back to Exponent Menu Printer Friendly Page   Other Articles of 2002   Christmas letter from El Salvador missions thanks diocesan Catholics   Bishop shares views, discussion with Central students   ETC slates Christmas specials throughout the season   My Favorite Christmas Memories   Guidelines on religious ed homeschooling are issued   Local Catholic radio station targets Feb. 1 date   HMs end 98-years of service to Salem St. Paul Parish   Learn ‘language’ of young, youth meet speaker urges   Bishop Tobin: Meeting in D.C. on norms was ‘anxious, tense, difficult’   Priests must ask one another the tough questions, speaker says   Catholic death and funeral rites   Deacons mark 25th with Mass, dinner, memories   Diocesan Ministry Convocation Speaker: Global solidarity, not globalization, should be aim   Jusseaume inaugurated as sixth Walsh president   Diaconate marks 25th anniversary with Oct. 27 fete   New norms sent to priests, deacons on Communion under both kinds   Ashtabula parishes are ‘one Catholic community’   Jusseaume to become Walsh’s sixth president   Charismatic speaker: ‘Church being tested in faithfulness’   Lutheran/Catholic covenant event draws 140 to Walsh   Canton St. Joseph Parish observes centennial celebration   HMHP CEO Michael Rowan   Stewardship speaker: It’s about gratitude and thanking God first   Imagination is key to resolving crisis, priests told   War with Iraq? Expo readers opposed by 81-19%   Newspaper columns didn’t give complete story, official says   Diocesan Ministry Convocation set Oct. 26 at YSU’s Kilcawley   New year brings new faculty, changes at diocesan high schools   Mont St. Michel, Avignon’s papal palace are treasures   Preparing for the priesthood   Entering well-earned retirement, Sr. Marcella’s not slowing down   Warren St. Mary observes 100th year for church building   Lay Ministry Formation program attracting new audience   The cathedrals of France: Monuments of faith in stone   Executive summary of the ad hoc commission on athletics in diocesan high schools   ‘No widespread abuse’ found   Milburn leaving pro-life post to pursue grad studies   Return to France yields history, memories, surprises   Two new members appointed for Diocesan Finance Council   Former SS. 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